There is a lot of discussion in the recovery world about “hitting bottom”. This is the point in life that seems irrecoverable. Whether it is an arrest, a loss of a job, the discovery by loved ones the extent of the problem, or health issues, “hitting bottom” implies a great deal of pain.
Complicating the pain encountered by “hitting bottom”, an addict must immediately give up their favorite coping mechanism. People with addiction problems use their drug of choice to numb pain, so frequently they have few other skills at their disposal to manage and walk through pain. I compare the ability to manage pain to working out a muscle. Often an addict’s “pain management muscle” is nearly atrophied. And like a muscle that has atrophied, using this muscle for the first time in a long is a difficult and often demoralizing task.
The hope for hitting a bottom lies in reaching out to others for support. Twelve step meetings are an excellent place to meet people that have been through similar bottoms. Also like building back a very weak muscle, individual with addictive disorders can learn to strengthen their ability to manage their pain.
As a counselor, I have watched countless people come into my office completely petrified to deal with pain. Addicts have learned that the way to deal with pain is to numb it or avoid it. I have found it considerably more helpful to teach skills of facing our pain and leaning in to the discomfort associated with early recovery. Then as the pain resilience muscle grows, individuals gain confidence in their ability to face pain and other uncomfortable emotions.